DrDeClutterBlog.com

I’ve been working with several clients recently who have lost parents or grandparents and are dealing with the aftermath of material possessions and what to do with it all. And, even though they may have siblings, together they are still stuck and the “job” is not getting done. Some have all the items in storage, others have crammed it into their homes, but it’s all taking up too much emotional energy and space.  

When our parents, grandparents or other family members pass away, someone - sometimes you or I - are designated to clean out the house and all the belongings. This can be more than some people can handle emotionally.

It’s not easy, but there are a few things you can do to move into and past this heavy “project.”

1. As I ask every client and workshop participant, “If your house (all this stuff) burned down today, would you miss it?” Many times people will stop, look startled, then sigh and say, “That would actually be great! I wouldn’t have to decide or deal with it at all!”

2. But, you do! So, in your mind, if your home was all cleared out, all the stuff from your parents/grandparents, etc. who you’re decluttering is gone and you start with a clean slate, what would you bring back in and keep, because you really love it?

3. Don’t hold onto things because you think you should. Only keep the items that really resonate with you and you really love. Keep your home your home, not a museum to the past - someone else’s past.

4. Make sure to really enjoy the items you keep. Display, wear or use them with joy. Don’t bury them for another 20-50 years for the next generation to toss into the dumpster!

5. Overtime you may find that you’ve gotten what you needed out of an item and you’re okay with letting it go. Do so with love and kindness.

6. Breathe deeply and let yourself grieve as you must to release the emotions stuck in all the stuff and memories good and bad fall move through you - so that they don’t get stuck.

©2009 Kim Wolinski, MSW “Dr. DeClutter” Stress, Change and Organizational Skills Expert  www.drdeclutter.com

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