Kissing: It’s a Good Thing!

Relationships, Support System No Comments »


“The sound of a kiss is much softer than that of a canon – but its echo lasts a great deal longer.”

“When words become superficial, humans make use of kisses.”
~ Sigmund Freud

There are lots of good reasons to want to kiss and be kissed. But, did you know that there are side-benefits from kissing? Here are a few:

1) Burn Calories!
A passionate kiss burns 6.4 – 10 calories per 10 minutes (about one calorie per minute)… depending on the research. A long kiss makes the metabolism burn up sugar faster than usual. The calories burned of course depend on the intensity of your kisses. No matter, you do burn calories, so… kiss more, lose weight!

(NOTE: Doing the chocolate heart-box thang?… There are 26 calories in a chocolate kiss… do the math!)

2) Prevents Tooth Decay! (NO WAY!!)
Dr. Peter Gorden, Dental Advisor at the British Dental Association, explains. “After eating, your mouth is full of sugar solution and acidic saliva, which cause plaque build up. Kissing is nature’s own cleaning process”, he adds. “It stimulates saliva flow and brings plaque levels down to normal.”

3) Stress Management.
A passionate kiss can relieve tension. It’s a great relaxation technique. It’s almost impossible to smile and feel tense at the same time. Our emotions and body language are so closely linked and when your mouth is in a kissing position, you are almost smiling (and might be smiling and laughing in between). Plus, in romantic kissing there is love and anticipation and all kinds of deep breathing and body reactions… creating a great relaxation response zone to stay in as long as you can. Make sure to close your eyes! Shut out everything else and “be” here and now and one with your kisses! Ahhhhh, that’s so good!

4) Increases Fitness Levels.
Just like when you’re exercising, your heart is pumping, your pulse is racing. When kissing is exciting, you also release adrenaline into the bloodstream and your heart pumps more blood around your body, bringing all that blushed skin tone to your face and all other beautiful parts! It’s a great cardiovascular workout!

5) Natural Face and Body Lift.
Kissing, lots of it… slows the aging process. It tones your cheek and jaw muscles, so they’re less likely to sag. (Side bar: Anything else that you can think of to accompany kissing… can stretch, strengthen and tone too! Flexibility at every age is very important.)

6) Ups Your Self-Esteem.
Kissing is a great boost for self-esteem. In theory, when you’re kissing, you’re happy. You’re excited. You’re anticipating unexpected things to happen. And when you’re happy and excited, you let go of the everyday routine and sometimes mundane thinking… you feel good about yourself, changing the chemistry of your brain and endorphin system for all- around wellness.


Enjoy kissing on Valentine’s Day… and every day.

©Kim Wolinski, MSW “Dr. DeClutter”Stress, Change and Organizational Skills Expert

Editors and publishers are free to reprint blog articles as long as it is reprinted in its entirety and the signature line remains intact.

Stop Dating. Start “Practicing!”

Relationships, Support System No Comments »


If you’re a single person, and want to be in a relationship again, you will actually have to “get out there” and meet people!

How do you feel about dating? It can be hard, a struggle, scary and panic-attack-provoking. Or, it can be simple, easy-breezy and fun.

The key to making it easy and taking all the stress out is this… STOP DATING!

Yes, don’t date… PRACTICE!

Can you feel the difference? I figured this out years ago. It makes so much sense to me. Why put all that heavy energy on spending time with someone new, “dating” when you can just “practice” being with them.

Practice is…

  • spending time with someone new
  • listening to new stories
  • looking at a new body
  • thinking about this person
  • talking and sharing
  • experiencing new ideas, thoughts, beliefs and activities
  • learning something new
  • learning more about yourself, your preferences “likes and dislikes”
  • expanding your mind and heart
  • laughing
  • just being with someone
  • just breathing with another “other” in life, very helpful

It’s all about practicing. Much lighter feel to that, eh?

I look forward to hearing how your next “practice” goes! Enjoy!

©Kim Wolinski, MSW “Dr. DeClutter” Stress, Change and Organizational Skills Expert

Editors and publishers are free to reprint blog articles as long as it is reprinted in its entirety and the signature line remains intact.

We Teach People How To Treat Us…OUCH!

Inner Clutter: Consciousness Building and Self-Care, Relationships, Support System No Comments »


Are you in relationships, even one, that never cease to be frustrating, confusing, drama-packed, toxic or abusive in any way?

Do you walk away from some people feeling like you never want to talk to them again?

If it’s acquaintances, co-workers, or friends, you can let them go or change jobs, but when it’s family, it’s much harder to deal with.

Having just come out of the holiday season you may of experienced some of this for sure, but unfortunately may deal with it more often throughout the year, or live with it/them. Sorry.

I can guess you’ve talked to them and asked them to change, shared your feelings, maybe cried, screamed or threatened if they don’t change. But they don’t. And, most likely, banning a miracle, they won’t.


So, it’s a hard pill to swallow, but yes, it’s true. We teach people how to treat us. Let that sink in for a moment.

Start being more conscious of how you communicate (or don’t communicate – which of course is communicating) your needs, wants, desires, etc. This whole deal implies that you actually must know who you are and what you want.

Do you know what you want? Most people don’t really know themselves and what they want so “settle” for what they’ve got.

You have to know what you want. What you don’t want. What you’re unwilling to settle for. What is ENOUGH! YOU have to decide these things for yourself.

You also must understand that when you get clear about what you want and communicate it, your someone, and lots of someones, are not going to like it.

As I teach all my audiences, there’s a saying for this, it is “Oh, well!” Yes, “Oh, well!”  Time keeps moving by, life is short and at some point you need to draw a line in the sand and live your life, and, some people will absolutely not like it! You are shaking up the status quo and their old habits, conditioning and patterns. “Oh, well!”

So, the next time you feel guilty, angry, hurt, slighted, taken advantage of, etc. see how you have taught that person to treat you that way. See if you can adjust your behaviors, actions and communication to be treated the way you want to be treated… even when they don’t like it.

Reality is, you may never get what you want from them, but you can detach enough to free yourself from feeling stressed and reacting to their craziness, which is very good for you.

Kim, “Dr. DeClutter”

Get more ideas for self-help. I am host of Formulas For Freedom radio show. Listen to past programs here:


If you need one-one-one help to strengthen your personal/life/decision making skills, I will work with you by phone. Find out more here:

Ticket To Shift – Priority Coach . . . . . (Tele-coaching)

10 Ways to Manage Stress

Goal Setting and Success, Health and Medical, Inner Clutter: Consciousness Building and Self-Care, Stress Management, Time and Money Management No Comments »

Stress is a normal part of life and usually comes from everyday occurrences. As a culture, or species, we’re not doing very well “managing” it.

Here are some ways you can deal with everyday sources of stress to keep your balance and calm, no matter what. Try a few and see how they help. Then try a few more!

1. Eliminate as many sources of stress as you can.

For example,

  • if crowds bother you, go to the supermarket when you know the lines won’t be too long.
  • Rent movies rather than going to crowded movie theaters.
  • Clear up the clutter in your life by moving out the things that get in your way.
  • Limit your time with people who are stressful and push your buttons.

2. Time Management.

If you are always running late, sit down with a pencil and paper and see how you are actually allotting your time. Say it takes you 40 minutes to get to work. Are you leaving your house on time? You may be able to solve your problem (and de-stress your life a bit) just by being realistic.

If you can’t find the time for all the activities that are important to you, maybe you are trying to do too much. Make a list of what you do during the day and how much each activity takes. Then cut back.

3. If you can’t remove the stress, remove yourself.

When in a crowd, gathering, party or work day, slip away once in a while for some private time. Excuse yourself from conversations when they are going nowhere or escalating for more stress and possible negative outcomes. Quiet moments and a time out may give you a fresh perspective on your problems. Avoid stressful people.

4. Avoid predictably stressful situations.

Don’t go in the first place. If a certain sport or game (whether it’s tennis or bridge), or event makes you tense, decline the invitation. After all, the point of these activities is to have a good time. If you know you won’t, there’s no reason to go.

This means you need to get to know yourself better and better. Plus, start finding new groups, friends, activities that are fun so that you can go and be involved.

5. Don’t compete.

Competing with others, whether in accomplishments, appearance, or possessions, is an avoidable source of stress. It’s just the ego trying to survive. Have a chat with your ego – nothing is that important. Reality TV takes care of more of that than any of us ever need to be around! Let them deal with it. Heck, they’re even getting paid a ton of money to do it? Plus…stop watching them too.

6. Slow down.

Labor saving devices, such as cell phones or computer hookups, often encourage us to cram too many activities into each day.

Before you buy new equipment, be sure that it will really improve your life. Be aware that taking care of equipment – maintenance – and getting it repaired can be stressful.

7. Try doing only one thing at a time.

Multi-tasking really isn’t good for us. So, for example, when you’re riding your exercise bike, you don’t have to listen to the radio, watch television, read a book or learn from an audio program.  Sometimes it’s okay to do nothing.

8. Pay attention to your health – body, mind and spirit.

If you suffer from insomnia, headaches, recurring colds, or stomach upsets, consider whether stress is part of the problem. Being chronically angry, frustrated, or apprehensive can deplete your physical resources.

Don’t ignore your body and health. Pay attention to signs and symptoms and get serious about your life. There is no magic pill or surgery that can fix problems forever.

9. Eat nutritious foods.

Nix fast foods, sugar, fried and processed foods. Change your lifestyle around food and watch stress, weight and craziness dissolve! Eat raw and healthy foods to rebuild your body and brain. Find more information on this at my health blog. (Though my health blog is thyroid focused, it is clean food focused – so great for everyone.)

10. Seek professional help

Early signs of excess stress are loss of a sense of well-being and reluctance to get up in the morning to face another day.  If you feel stress (or anything else) is getting the better of you, seek professional help, a doctor or therapist.

New Program Available: ONE RABBIT: The 7-Step Method to Get Unstuck and Live the Life You Want Now

Change and Transition, Dr. DeClutter Workshops/Events, Goal Setting and Success, Inner Clutter: Consciousness Building and Self-Care, Stress Management, Time and Money Management No Comments »

.Frustrated With Your Life Not Going Where You Want?

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Question: Where will you be in 6-12 months if you don’t do this?

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You can also work with me one-on-one by phone. Find out more here.





Organize Your New Year’s Thoughts Around What You Want, Not What You Don’t Want

Change and Transition, Goal Setting and Success, Inner Clutter: Consciousness Building and Self-Care No Comments »



This would seem an easy question to answer, right? But, how hard do you find it to answer right now? And, even if you say, “I just want to be happy,” what does that mean exactly? What does that mean specifically? Do you know?

What do you want? . . .

  • in your relationships?
  • in regards to your health?
  • in regards to your finances?
  • in your job?
  • in your education?
  • in your recreational activities?
  • in your spiritual life?

Wherever you don’t find peace and flow in your life, there is where you will “want” something different.


“How can you live your wants now (peace, happiness, joy) instead of just wanting your wants? (struggle, frustration, yearning)”

To be a conscious creator we need to be aware of our intentions, attentions and actions. The key here is to start to think, know, believe, intend and act upon what you WANT, not upon what you DON’T WANT. Step forward into your best life instead of backwards, or freezing in neutral. Lean in, not back.

Our minds naturally go for the negative, the don’t want. “I don’t want to gain weight!” Instead of, “I want to stay at the weight that I am.” Or, better yet, “I love being the weight I am and will do what it takes to stay here!”

Being proactive is paramount in setting your New Year’s Goals and Intentions. Your “New Year” starts any time you choose. Set your DO WANTS now!

EXERCISE: On a piece of blank paper make two columns. On one side write all of the DON’T WANTS. Go ahead and get them out of your head! After you have a good list of them, in the other column, rewrite the DON’T WANTS into DO WANTS like the example above. Keep doing this until you find that your brain has been retrained to start thinking DO WANTS first!

Start thinking, communicating and acting from DO WANT more and more often and see how you feel better, life seems more positive, people, ideas and experiences show up in better ways because you are showing up in a better way!

Share your experiences with me in the comment section. It’s great to hear how you’re doing!


phone - ear-mouth part only with cordI’d love to work with you if you just can’t seem to stay focused and on track with your daily decisions about any and all areas of  your life.

I’m a PRIORITY COACH and will be happy to help you choose, redecide, plan and stick with it, whatever your end goal may be.  We’ll work together by phone… FIND OUT MORE HERE…


Thanksgiving Expectations, Be Gone! Less Stress Equals More Happy!

Holiday Organizing All Year Round, Relationships, Support System, Stress Management 1 Comment »



Loosen up this Thanksgiving. Enjoy your friends and family and the quiet that engulfs a holiday. Don’t let perfectionism and “It has to be my way (or the highway!)” cost you your happiness and good relations with those around you.

At the same time, don’t let other’s too high of expectations ruin your day either.

It’s all about flow… no matter what! Sometimes it’s about stopping and regrouping, redeciding mid-stream. That’s absolutely okay to do. Laugh more. Love more. Enjoy more.


Discuss everyone’s needs and ideas for what they want to make the day work. Compromise and enjoy it more.

At the same time, do all that you can do, want to do and love to do to prepare, get ready and feel good about your holiday table and home, while at the same time, lighten up and know that something will be forgotten, missed, broken, spilled, smashed, crashed, dropped or eaten (by your dog). It’s okay.

broken plate



Next year? Too early? Never!

What this means is to take the time today and in the next few days after Thanksgiving to go back over your prepared lists and plans and see what you can alter for next year that will make it even easier, better and more stress-free for YOU and for others. The sooner you do this the better off you’ll feel year after year. And, that’s what gratitude looks like!

Happy Thanksgiving!! 


Oh! PS! If you really need an escape for some R&R (promo here!), my brother, Dave, and I bought the Old Town Guesthouse B&B and Conference Center in June. Come stay and get away with us!! I also offer private and group wellness and healing Retreats here. Contact me – – and let’s discuss your personal needs, or a group you’re part of that may like to come stay, play, get away and take the time for self-care; find answers and solutions to everyday issues in our Retreat Learning Center programs.

Organizing From The Inside Out – How To Stop Hoarding, Stockpiling and Use Stuff Up

Inner Clutter: Consciousness Building and Self-Care, Kitchen, Storage No Comments »

Too much tea (1)

Can one have too much tea?


Stop it.

Drink what you have before buying more.

What do you have “too much” of?

Most of my clients have one or two things bursting at the seams in their houses, like

  • canned soup
  • candles
  • jewelry
  • shoes
  • magazines
  • a specific craft – yarn, quilting, scrap booking stuff
  • a specific collectibles, that they don’t even like or care about anymore, like pigs, penguins and Red Hat stuff


After we’ve unearthed piles of “it” I tell them, “Okay, I have to give you the ‘Dr. DeClutter Rule of Stop It.’ Stop buying more of “this” until you use it all up! or have a plan to organize it, and use it more often and enjoy it, in the case of clothing or accessories.

We always end up laughing, but they get it.

When buying more and more of certain items but not really using them, appreciating or honoring them there is an edge to this behavior that is close to hoarding, but for most people it is unconscious, habitual buying.


Use what you have, use it all up, before buying more. Otherwise, you’re just feeding an addiction, wasting time and money, using up space, adding to clutter, staying distracted, etc.

In the case of shoes and jewelry, make sure they are organized so that you can really see them, enjoy them, find them and wear them more often.


Oh, by the way, that image above, that’s my kitchen counter! “Was” my kitchen counter. Boy, I drank a lot of tea to cull that stockpile down! Much of it was given to me, I didn’t buy it, but still.


Another issue with collecting, storing, not using what you have or enjoying it is that some things do go bad, they deteriorate, lose their flavor and freshness, go out of style (as in clothing/shoes/accessories) etc. So, by the time you do get around to using it, it’s not that great, and in regards to food products, actually bad for your health and has to be thrown out.

So, let’s stop the madness, stress and waste. Let’s all shake ourselves awake, get organized, and enjoy what we have without buying more.


Declutter for Your Health, Stealth and Wealth

- ORGANIZING TIPS AND TOOLS, Business Success, Goal Setting and Success, Health and Medical, Inner Clutter: Consciousness Building and Self-Care, Safety and Security, Stress Management, Time and Money Management No Comments »


What is keeping you from getting your finances organized?


When we keep dumping our projects, junk mail, stuff and things and not maintaining an organized space, we risk forgetting where we put important papers, losing vital documents and creating a general health, stealth and wealth hazard that will kick us in the butt soon enough!

And, if our heaps and piles have been sitting in the same place for much too long, we are running the risk for a myriad of problems that, thank goodness, can be remedied easily.


Why a health hazard?

When you let things pile up there are other problems in the places you ignore that are piling up too, namely

     1. dust

     2. microscopic “dust mites” that live in dust (ew)

     3. mold, mildew – possible fuzzy, growing things if there is moisture and/or food of any kind

     4. bugs, spider and cob webs

     5. mice and other vermin

     6. bacteria and germs

These problems can cause you several more problems, like health issues.

Enjoying clean air in our homes is not only nice, it’s important to our health. The more dust, mold and unwanted critters you have on and under your unmoved piles add to allergies, respiratory problems and more.


Stealth means a lot of things, but I mean it as your way of moving through your life streamlined, with peace, calm, flow and without struggle. That is impossible without taking control of areas of clutter in our homes. Paper is one of the worst.


Clutter promotes poor air quality and the growth of things like mold that can affect your health. Allergens, germs and vermin all love disarray and all can wreak havoc on your body.

When I walk into a clients home where there are old papers, “memorabilia” items from long ago, mold, mildew, etc. I get a stuffed nose and head within minutes. I’m kind of a canary in the coalmine for bad air quality. I have had to wear a face mask on a few occasions.

health - face mask

Poor health affects your work and, in turn, your financial well being. A general cleanup and reorganization can help get you back to your healthy, productive self.


1. Schedule time to deal with it. And by “dealing with it” I mean decide, declutter and reorganize.

house cleaning - broom and dust pan w dust bunny

2. Clean up. Get out the cleaning supplies and dust, sweep, vacuum, etc. Get the dust and dust bunnies, cob webs and possible bugs and mouse droppings (ick) cleaned out before putting things back.


Dampen your cloth with a misting of water, so as not to harm wood, dust and dry the wood immediately, or use furniture polish.

house cleaning - feather duster

Don’t blow dust off things, use a dry cloth or feather dusters as these methods of dusting only “poof” the dust into the air, having it come down to land somewhere else, and in your lungs.


It is very worthwhile to invest in a the best kind of vacuum cleaner, the non-bag kind with a filter that won’t kick the fine dirt, silt and dust that it picks up back into the house.

If you do have a vacuum cleaner with filter bags, make sure to change them regularly, before they are bursting and over-full to help keep down the amount of particles thrown into the air. If you aren’t careful in this area, your indoor air can actually get worse after a vacuuming due to all the dust getting kicked back up into the air.

house cleaning - dirt devil vac

You can buy an expensive one, like Dyson, or less costly, that work very well like a Dirt Devil. I love mine and it works great.

Plus, while it’s obvious to vacuum carpets, it’s as important to regularly vacuum other home items like fabric furniture, drapes, throw pillows, dog beds and anything of fabric. Smaller hand held vacuums, like a Black & Decker with the enclosed dust holder (not bags) can also be used for the draperies, etc.

house cleaning - black and decker hand vac


By the way, enclosed bags pick up tons more than a paper/material bag. Tons more. You’ll be shocked and amazed at how much!

3. Keep it clean. Maintain all areas on an ongoing basis as all of the above aspects due to ignoring an area can and will start happening again.

Love your space organized and it will love you back, keeping you healthy, stealthy and wealthy. At least it will give you a better chance at being in control of  these areas, creating an efficient, effective life.


Happy Chinese New Year, and Year of the Horse!

Change and Transition, Inner Clutter: Consciousness Building and Self-Care No Comments »

animals - horse

According to the Chinese Zodiac,

the Year of 2014 is the Year of the Horse,

which begins today, January 31, 2014,

and ends on February 18, 2015.

The Horse is the seventh sign of the Chinese Zodiac, which consists of 12 Animal Signs.

In Chinese culture, the Horse is a symbol of

  • nobility,
  • class,
  • speed and
  • perseverance,

all great characteristics each of us needs and can learn to exhibit daily.


People born in the Year of the Horse are smart, fabulous speakers who have a gift for getting through to other people. They believe that their aim in life is “to seek individual freedom and happiness.”


The Year of the Horse 2014 promises a lot of new things, not least of all adventure, excitement and romance for those who are looking. One of the best ways to energize all the positive attributes of the Horse Year is to display beautiful horse images in the home. Pick those which resonate with you most strongly and those which evoke positive energies and emotions in you, and invite the excellent energies into your home.

For lots more information, go here.  


Red ticket in black hand    If you get stuck and just can’t seem to figure out what to do or how to do the to do’s that you do know to do!… I’d love to work with you one-on-one as your Priority Coach to make the shifts and changes you desire.

Find out more here. 

Don’t stay stuck when there is help right here. Be more of what you want to be, do and have in the next few months by purchasing your Ticket To Shift! Let’s be more like the admirable horse this year!


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